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Teaching children about giving  |
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Here are some ways to get your children involved in giving, and make them understand that it is part of their obligation as members of a community. You also will be teaching them to budget for gifts to institutions that share their values. This is a very noble and important goal.
*Talk to them about your giving patterns. Maybe you give to your house of worship. Or perhaps you've coached in your daughter's soccer league for years. Often our children aren't aware that the time and money you do devote to these efforts are taken away from other things that might be momentarily more pressing or pleasurable. You need to let your children know that these things involve sacrifice and why you feel that sacrifice and sharing yourself with others in need is important. If your family sets aside a percentage of its income to give to various charities, talk about that too, and how you made it fit in to your family's budget. And talk about why you have chosen the charities that you have.
*Ask them how they would like to give to their community, and help them get involved. At a very young age, children develop empathy, and that natural human feeling can be used to promote discussions about charitable giving. Many parents do this with preschoolers by having them choose old toys to give to those less fortunate. An older child may want to set aside a portion of his allowance, and you can tell him that he can make his donation even bigger by asking members of his family for money as well. Then step him through choosing a legitimate charity by using your own knowledge, searching the Internet, or calling your local United Way. If a child wants to get his friends involved in a community effort, such as a car wash, help him gather the information about participating. Consult your community newspaper or Town Hall.
*Think globally, act locally. There are so many acts of human kindness that all of us living in this area will be able to perform as we come to grips with the life-changing tragedy we have all experienced. So much of the healing work will be done in our own communities, in the months and years to come. Our towns and cities have lost important leaders, as well as mothers, fathers, sons and daughters. Remind your children that a simple act of kindness to a child who is grieving for a parent, or cookies for a widow down the street, is just as important as a grand gesture in the days following the tragedy.
*Accept that your child may be overwhelmed. If you've never talked about charity, or others less fortunate than yourself before this incident, accept that your child may be overwhelmed. Even if he is initiating the conversation about wanting to help others, he may feel that because he's "just a kid" anything that he does won't be enough to make a difference. What your child needs to do is break the "crisis" down into manageable parts. She needs to focus on one small aspect of the problem, or one "kind" of person she'd like to help. If she's always looked up to police officers, she could contribute to a policeman's fund, play for a police athletic league, or write letters to police officers in her own town thanking them for their service to the community, depending on her age and understanding of the situation.
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